Emotional Intimacy is a blessing everyone should experience. It is when a person can freely love another without inhibitions. This also translates as having butterflies in the stomach. Yet such a gift isn’t harnessed by all. Following thorough studies, experts have come up with a word that describes a fear of love. This is known as Philophobia.
What Is Philophobia?
It is a no-brainer that phobia attached to a word means the fear of. In this case, the word philophobia describes the fear of falling in love. It also touches on the fear of sharing emotional intimacy and connection. While it may not seem like a big deal, it is a troubling fear to have because it lingers on detachment. A person with philophobia would find it difficult to trust or connect to an individual. Instead, they would prefer their own company. Ultimately this leads to addiction problems, depression, and emotional detachment.
Signs That You Fear Emotional Intimacy
Rejecting the thought of emotional intimacy is a clear sign of philophobia. However the intensity ranges. For some, the mere thought of being vulnerable with another puts them off. Simply put, they have commitment issues. Their entire being is shaken to its core when such a thought or topic arises. Now, what are the telltale signs of philophobia?
- A person with such fear experiences rapid heartbeats and breathing.
- They suffer symptoms like diarrhea, vomiting, nausea and dizziness.
- Chest pain.
- Panic attacks and anxiety
- Resistance to intimacy
- Constantly pushing people away when the relationship becomes intense.
- Ghosting on their partners.
These signs go to show that a person’s mental state can affect their physical well-being. There are indeed some experiences that trigger this phobia. They include:
Constant Heartbreaks and Past Trauma
A cycle of heartbreaks can limit a person’s belief in love.
Low Self Esteem
This highlights a person’s lack of confidence in themselves. They may think they are not good enough to be loved.
Cultural Rules
Some people may not be opportune to express their feelings due to cultural limitations. It could be as a result of the guidelines their family or culture puts in place.
Overcoming Emotional Intimacy
Acknowledging a problem makes it less cumbersome to deal with. For people with philophobia, it is best they first get real with themselves. Only then will they be able to open up about the incoming changes.
The five golden rules to beat the fear of emotional intimacy are:
Get a Grip On Emotions
Some feelings have been sidelined for long due to past trauma. Once identified, learn to deal with the emotions. Additionally, understand that getting heartbreaks is a risk people in love must take. Sometimes there are no guarantees for a lifelong romance even among happy couples.
Conquering Emotional Intimacy Involves Be Vulnerable
Putting up a front or a brick wall is no way to handle emotional intimacy. This would only lead to social isolation and disconnection in relationships. Once in love, open up to the possibility of being seen and having to rely on someone.
Know That Time Heals
For a person who has suffered recurrent heartbreaks, giving up on love is not the best way to handle it. It is best to give it time, while consciously working on self-fulfillment. When an individual becomes confident in themselves, they can make standard decisions about their lives. Remember to also allow time to lead in the journey of emotional intimacy. For the fear to fully wither off, there must be a process. It never happens at the snap of the fingers.
Be Truthful
First, learn to accept that that fear is present. Then know what triggers such fears and avoid them. If there is a need to meet a professional for guidance, feel free to consult one. But never fail to speak the truth during these consultations.
Final Note
When the time to fall in love eventually comes, be sure to pick a complementary partner. This doesn’t mean that there will be no hurdles. But with a fine partner, things will always get sorted.
#Clique, what are your thoughts?
