Marriage in itself is no joke. Mental illnesses can also be exhausting and frustrating. Hence, it can become overwhelming when you have to combine marriage with taking care of a spouse with mental illness. However, you may end up with a spouse with mental illness or already have one. Therefore, knowing how to navigate that situation will help you get through it.
Thankfully, although most mental illnesses cannot be prevented, they can be treated so that you and your spouse can live good lives. If you want to be a supportive partner, you will find tips on how to care for a spouse with mental illness in this article.
How Common Is Mental Illness?
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), 1 in 8 people globally have a mental disorder. A study by the Harvard Medical School also discovered that half of the global population will develop a mental disorder by the age of 75. Mental disorders are serious and require care, compassion, and support. They can affect every area of one’s life, including school, relationships, and work. Mental illness usually presents early between childhood and adolescence. It can also emerge in young adults.
Types of Mental Illnesses
Mental illnesses are broadly categorized into the following:
- Anxiety disorders, which include panic disorder, OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder), and phobias.
- Psychotic disorders, which include schizophrenia
- Personality disorders: BPD (borderline personality disorder), narcissism, and APD (antisocial personality disorder)
- Mood disorders. These include depression and bipolar disorder.
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- Eating disorders: bulimia, anorexia
- Disruptive behavior disorders
- Substance use disorder: alcoholism, hard drug addiction, etc.
Your partner could be struggling with any of this. They may also be at risk of any of these mental illnesses if they have a family history of mental illness or once had it. Additionally, your spouse could be at risk if they experienced abuse or neglect as a child, sexual assault, traumatic childbirth, history of postpartum depression, or war. Other risk factors are stressful and traumatic life experiences like bereavement, divorce, or financial challenges.
Caring for a Spouse with Mental Illness
Understand Your Spouse’s Illness
You can learn to care for a spouse with mental illness when you know what they are dealing with. You can get a ton of information on the internet. Know their mental situation, including their name, symptoms, and triggers. Then, learn how to alleviate it so you can adequately support them. Seek professional help as well and talk to counselors about options.
Talk to Your Spouse
Another way to care for a spouse with mental illness is to communicate with them. Discuss their experiences with the illness and ask them how you can help. Don’t be afraid to ask or share anything with them. Treat them the way you would if they were not struggling with the mental illness, and don’t indulge them, either. If they offend you, let them know once their episodes are over so resentment doesn’t build up. Be supportive, but don’t enable bad behavior.
Get a Support Network
There will be days when you are tired and frustrated. In such situations, having a close network you can be open with will help you. There are also support groups for families of people with mental illnesses. They can provide great resources for you if you have a spouse with mental illness. Don’t be afraid to reach out and ask questions about anything you don’t know. Communities like Reddit’s r/BipolarSOs also provide a safe space to discuss your experiences. You and your spouse can also attend couples’ counseling.
Focus on the Positives
Although it can be more tiring caring for a spouse with mental illness, it’s best not to focus on the bad moments. Instead, focus on the positive memories and your partner’s good qualities. Think of the love you share and your commitment to each other. This can help you get through the bad times together.
Engage in Self-Care
It is easy to forget yourself while taking care of a spouse with mental illness. However, that can cause further strain on your relationship and endanger your marriage. When you take care of yourself, you will be recharged and able to tackle challenges better. Take time off regularly to enjoy your hobbies, walk, exercise, read, garden, or spend time with friends. This way, your life won’t revolve around caring for your spouse. If you neglect yourself, you may also develop a mental disorder or burnout.
You can still have a good marriage even if you are taking care of a spouse with mental illness. However, you must be committed to getting the right care from professionals and following through with treatment. You must also be ready to do more work and fully support your partner.
#Clique, have you ever cared for a partner with mental illness? What was your experience like? Share with us in the comments.
