There is no reason to fear abandonment because it is not a death sentence. However, it is a dangerous issue that cripples your well-being and should not be swept under the carpet. Feeling abandoned can affect the way you relate to those around you. It can also influence how you see yourself. Nobody wants to go through abandonment issues, so it is almost not the victim’s fault. With pointers from Marriage.com, this article serves as a guide towards discovering and challenging the fear of feeling alone.
People Dealing With Fear Of Abandonment Will Likely:
Be Sensitive to Criticism
You can only thrive when you accept criticism, but those suffering from fear of abandonment see things differently. They can almost not handle criticism, which leaves them feeling hurt and rejected. So rather than becoming better, they would get defensive and look out for threats.
Show Intense Jealousy
This jealousy will disturb a healthy relationship, yet they show it. They are jealous due to the fear of losing that thing or person. For romance, they will clamp down on their partners having friends or close relatives.
Run from Intimacy
The irony of the abandonment issue is that while it stirs some people to be possessive, it causes others to shield themselves. By doing this, they hope not to get too comfortable with another who they fear may leave them at any time.
Fear of Abandonment Aids Lack of Confidence
They are never confident and need to see, hear, or feel it from an outside source. Sometimes, they go the extra mile to get a thumbs up, which may never truly fill the hollow.
Causes of Abandonment Issues
- Abandonment From Parents
- The trauma suffered during childhood
- Borderline Personality Disorder
- Unstable Emotions
- Rejection From Society
Overcoming Fear of Abandonment
- Accept that you have a problem and be ready to fix it.
- The next step is to confide in a professional and enroll in a therapy session.
- Try self-help by filling yourself with positive affirmations and writing your experiences.
- Don’t give room to negativity or bad energy.
- Always speak up when you feel neglected.
- Practice critical thinking and never assume hastily.
- Surround yourself with family and friends who are willing to help you.
N.B: As mentioned above, the disadvantages of fear of abandonment significantly outweigh its advantages and can limit your potential. It is always best to attack the problem once you spot it.
In this age of social media madness, many are seeking online validation. Learn to detach yourself from this craze and tell yourself you are enough. Meanwhile, try and be open with your communications and love freely.