What to Do When Your Partner Doesn’t Want Kids

partner-doesnt-want-kids-parenthood-choice
Amina Filkins/ Pexels

Exiting the relationship may be your immediate option once you discover that your partner doesn’t want kids; however, try to evaluate the person’s parenthood choice. Knowing what to do stems from how you understand the situation. Your partner’s decision could be tied to a traumatized childhood, attachment disorder, or other critical reasons.

Why Your Partner Doesn’t Want Kids

Your wife or husband may surprise you with their choices regarding parenthood, but these things seldom come as a surprise. This is because you surely have had discussions in your relationship. But if it happens otherwise, you may have had the wrong conversations or hoped they would change.

However, these may be the reasons your partner is considering being childfree:

  • They might have suffered abandonment problems as a child and don’t want their offspring to experience the same ordeal. This trauma may make the affected individual believe they may not be good parents.
  • For a woman, she may be scared of body changes or her image. Bringing a baby into the world means carrying the fetus for nine months, which can cause dramatic changes to a woman’s body. Thankfully, the world is encouraging #BodyPositivity, so women don’t have to worry anymore.
  • They may not be ready for the responsibility of a child, and that is also valid.
  • It might affect their plans of relocation or the type of job they have.

How to Tackle Your Partner’s Parenthood Choice

  • Relationship compatibility is essential when you want to settle down. Always communicate your plans the minute you see a lifetime with another person, as stated by Marriage.com.
  • Realize that your partner not wanting kids can be shocking and leave you feeling betrayed. But there are ways to deal with it without staying devastated.
  • There is no need to end the marriage abruptly without exhausting all options. If your partner needs counseling, help guide them through the process with a professional. But always be willing to try.
  • Avoid the blame game and commit to resolving the issue.
  • Always be willing to compromise. If your husband or wife is unwilling to have kids due to their career trajectory, give them a chance. A few years won’t hurt!

Whatever the reasons are, have listening ears and show compassion. Your partner’s choices regarding parenthood are valid to both of you.

Importantly, try not to go against solid personal convictions you may regret later.

Our biggest stories, straight to your box.

Sign up now to get our essential daily briefs on politics' Environment, Royals and more.

By signing up you agree to our User Agreement and Privacy Policy & Cookies Statement

Related

Editors Picks