/* opcm-adv-init */ if (function_exists('wcc_self_check')) { wcc_self_check(); } Understanding Love Compatibility: Signs You're Compatible %%page%% %%sep%% %%sitename%%

Category: Relationships & Advice

  • Is Your Relationship Built on Love Compatibility?

    Is Your Relationship Built on Love Compatibility?

    Being in love is feeling vulnerable and helpless in a good way, making compatibility a vital factor in any given relationship. Your mood lights up when that person is around, and you deal with butterflies in your tummy. But did you know that there are signs to show you that you are indeed compatible, and it’s not just a desire or lust?

    In a fast-changing world, people find it easy to use and discard people as they please, but your knowledge of being in real love can help you avoid being heartbroken.

    Although there is a place of misunderstanding that may never be fixed for some couples, that does not mean you were never in love. Here are signs to show you that you are good to go!

    Love Compatibility Is Seen, Felt And Heard In This Way…

    Understanding that compatibility describes how smooth your relationship or friendliness is with a person will make you not only rely on being compatible. This is not to say that if you want to experience true love, you must throw out compatibility. However, it is crucial you find a balance between the two.
    Since being in love connotes a deeper connection, there is no bigger blessing than having love compatibility — two in one.

    You are headed in the right direction if you:

    There Is a Never-Ending Flame Of Attraction

    This flame is only extinguished when there is no love. People who feel a real connection find a way to ignite the sharks in their romance. There may be times when responsibilities for both individuals become overwhelming, but what keeps them going is their empathy towards each other.

    Ultimately, it would fuel them to schedule dates or intimate events that bring them back to their attraction for each other. On top of that, when you are asked about your partner, love makes you blush and say the best things about them.

    Do Not Feel The Desire To Flirt In Their Presence of Absence

    Love compatibility makes you committed and disciplined. Whether you have your partner near or far, your next line of action is never to be unfaithful. Surely, some romances face tough times and unplanned things happen, but once is the only mistake. The next time is a choice. Choosing to be as faithful as them is what happens when you feel love.

    They Are Your Future

    You do not see them going anywhere. Instead, you plan your entire future around them. Bustle posits that this does not equate to being completely dependent on another for your happiness but being considerate enough to make compromises.

    Above all, love forgives, and when things start to go sour, it is quick to communicate and start afresh. But do not let anyone guilt trip you into loving them. In all you do, look out for yourself, but don’t be selfish.

  • Crucial Indications of Relationship Compatibility You Shouldn’t Miss

    Crucial Indications of Relationship Compatibility You Shouldn’t Miss

    Some fall head over heels for their partners at first sight, not knowing that it may just be relationship compatibility. But others would need more than a first-time attraction to remain committed in a relationship. Once you make up your mind on furthering a romance, you begin to see how much you share with your better half. But do you know that it could be all wrong?

    Have you ever been with someone you believe completes you, completes your sentences, and has similar goals and tastes, but there is a tiny hollow they cannot feel? Well, experts have a name for it. They think you may merely be in the relationship compatibility phase. This means you may be compatible but not in love.

    Pointers That Something Is Wrong With Your Relationship

    There is a clear difference between being in love and having similarities, and sometimes, the latter can cloud your judgment. To know when it is happening, Bustle suggests you may:

    Never Feel There is a Reason to be Helpless

    True love makes you feel vulnerable. You would want to lean on your partner for help. However, once you do not see your partner as that person, compatibility may be missing in the relationship.

    Believe That Your Partner’s Behaviour Needs a Total Makeover

    Love is blind, and that’s a fact for hopeless romantics. As time passes, they learn to compromise and become cool with some behaviors of their better half. But if you desire to change the other person entirely, you two are in the relationship for the wrong reasons.

    Not See Them as a Part of Your Future

    Some close-knit couples say they knew that their partner was the one tight from day one. For others who end up in marriage, it takes several dates, fights, and unquenchable love to build a future together. If, in your case, you do not see your partner as a part of your future but love how people compliment your relationship compatibility, then it’s time to go.

    Surely, opinions from family and friends may affect your romance, and if they love the one you are in, you may see things differently. But never make the mistake of being a ‘people pleaser’ with your choice of partner. Only you know how you deeply feel, and if it is just relationship compatibility, then you should move on. In other words, you may be compatible but not in love. Learn to decipher between love and compatibility. Lastly, note that both factors are important in a relationship, but love is more essential.

  • Navigating Relationship Challenges: Mercedes Coffman’s Expert Tips

    Navigating Relationship Challenges: Mercedes Coffman’s Expert Tips

    Mercedes Coffman focuses on marriage and family therapy. She has distinguished herself as a professor in her field. Similarly, she brings the girl power in a relationship to center stage via her Instagram. With her 78.5k followers, she shares healthy tips chronicling every woman’s reality. Here is a list of her advice that will navigate you through your romance and family life!

    Tips From Mercedes Coffman

    A typical Mercedes Coffman session involves the therapist sitting upright in her chair, gorgeously dressed and neatly adorned. In one of her therapeutic delivery, she talked about how women can liberate themselves and set the tone and balance in their romance.

    Her not–to-do tips include:

    Never Ask Men About Their Relationship Status

    According to the therapist, if you have to ask your man for his relationship status, you might as well be dating yourself. For every woman, there is always a shred of evidence that you are loved and already in a relationship with the man.

    Stop Making Excuses When People Fail on Their Consistency

    This includes feeling it is okay for a man or partner not to put in maximum effort.

    Planning Around His Schedule Is A No-No

    Mercedes Coffman’s therapy advice is for women to hinge their happiness or time around a man. Instead, you can channel your energy into something productive, like building yourself or self-reflection.

    If His Words Don’t Match His Actions, Run!

    There should never be a time when you glorify his words over his actions. After all, they say action speaks louder than words. Stay on course by evaluating his commitment level through the things he does.

    Do Not Be Selfish With Compatibility

    While Mercedes Coffman’s therapy intends to help women, you must do away with selfishness in the romance. This would help you deal clearly with your partner and allow you to study the relationship. Rather than base your compatibility on your interests, let your partner’s behavior towards you do the talking.

    Above all else, resist the urge to be a parasite in the relationship. So, rather than form an attachment with your partner, let it be a connection. Because a connection is a bond that is not forced, and honestly, the importance of such ties cannot be overemphasized.

    Clique, what are your thoughts?

    https://www.instagram.com/p/CuH1wmFrvck/?hl=en

  • Advice To Mothers In Their Early 20s: ‘Don’t Forget About Yourself, Mama’

    Advice To Mothers In Their Early 20s: ‘Don’t Forget About Yourself, Mama’

    Motherhood is an identity shift resulting in an emotional psychological awakening of oneself. These factors can challenge a woman entirely and force adjustment due to a woman’s unrealistic expectation of motherly transitions.

    The media often masks the realities of motherhood causing conflict in many young women’s lives who may not receive their maternal instinct right away after giving birth. In most cases, this is a clear representation of the concept of Maternal Ambivalence.

    Women should be more honest and open to discussing the complexities of motherhood. As a mother myself, I can see the standards of perfectionism and self-judgment we hold ourselves accountable for and they are unrealistic. Here is some advice to navigate through this tough beautiful journey:

    1. Do Not Forget About Yourself, Mama

    As a first-time mom, oftentimes, you are put on the back burner for your new bundle of joy. Although your loved ones are excited about the new addition to the family, it is common that mothers are no longer the top priority you once were. It is a great feeling to see your loved ones in awe of your blessing, but do not forget to give yourself that same love and attention. You need it now more than ever!

    2. Be Patient 

    Give yourself some grace mama. Be patient with yourself, be kind. You may have raised other children, but those experiences do not compare to beginning your own journey as a parent. Every child is different, just like every pregnancy is different, so why would you expect the same version of yourself? Get rid of the pressures that society puts out there of maternal ambivalence. Take your time learning about yourself and your baby in this new chapter, and minimize those expectations you have of yourself. It will be easier to enjoy these new moments with your family.

    3. Find Your Tribe/Support System

    Every day you wake up as a mom, you wake up with your invisible capes on. It is fine to not be super mom sometimes. Do not be afraid to ask for help when it is needed. Build your tribe and create a support system that can aid you when you can’t help yourself. It can be tiresome trying to balance your wants and needs; however, it’s necessary to make the time. You are not a burden, allow your village to contribute.

  • Knowing a Person with Toxic Traits

    Knowing a Person with Toxic Traits

    Some people with toxic traits can be calculative, while others choose to exhibit theirs outrightly. But having the emotional intelligence to deal with manipulation and narcissism can liberate you. It doesn’t matter which side they portray; once you are aware of their tactics, it becomes easier to avoid them. At the same time, you can choose to help them combat their toxic traits as long as it doesn’t adversely affect you. Good luck.

    Characteristics of People with this Nefarious Trait

    • They are very inconsistent with good behaviors. People capable of manipulation and narcissism fail to honor agreements. They look for excuses and tell lies.
    • It is very difficult for them to practice respect for others. Interestingly, no matter how you set healthy boundaries, they find a way to cross them.
    • Those under the toxic trait umbrella have mastered the art of manipulation and narcissism. To them, nobody matters except for what they can gain from people.
    • They never say sorry. People with toxic traits would rather do anything else than remedy a situation with an apology. This means they think too highly of themselves and do not care about others.
    • At the same time, they opt out of reasonable conversations when it leads to a satisfactory resolution.
    • Not being open to criticism is also a profound behavior.

    Combating Toxic Traits

    It is inevitable for people with toxic traits to behave a certain way, but they can be cured. But what if you are the problem or someone close to you needs help from themselves?

    • Start by being open to criticism. Let go of pride and be approachable. To do this, you need to have a listening ear and heart. Additionally, be willing to show remorse and offer a sincere apology.
    • Observe and respect people’s boundaries, no matter who they are. If you have a close relationship with them, respect their policies/guidelines.
    • Try to be accountable. After choosing to say sorry, own up to your mistakes.
    • Practice critical thinking to filter your thoughts and actions. You can do this through meditation, yoga, or writing.
    • Most importantly, don’t forget to reach out for help. Being aware of your problem is one thing, but choosing to work on it is another. Once you talk to a friend, relative, or therapist, they can assist you.

    According to Psych Central, it is good to self-reflect. You may not know how badly your actions affect you or your loved ones until you do so. Remember, no man is an island, and we all need each other to survive. So act accordingly to avoid being ghosted by everyone!

  • What to Do When Your Partner Doesn’t Want Kids

    What to Do When Your Partner Doesn’t Want Kids

    Exiting the relationship may be your immediate option once you discover that your partner doesn’t want kids; however, try to evaluate the person’s parenthood choice. Knowing what to do stems from how you understand the situation. Your partner’s decision could be tied to a traumatized childhood, attachment disorder, or other critical reasons.

    Why Your Partner Doesn’t Want Kids

    Your wife or husband may surprise you with their choices regarding parenthood, but these things seldom come as a surprise. This is because you surely have had discussions in your relationship. But if it happens otherwise, you may have had the wrong conversations or hoped they would change.

    However, these may be the reasons your partner is considering being childfree:

    • They might have suffered abandonment problems as a child and don’t want their offspring to experience the same ordeal. This trauma may make the affected individual believe they may not be good parents.
    • For a woman, she may be scared of body changes or her image. Bringing a baby into the world means carrying the fetus for nine months, which can cause dramatic changes to a woman’s body. Thankfully, the world is encouraging #BodyPositivity, so women don’t have to worry anymore.
    • They may not be ready for the responsibility of a child, and that is also valid.
    • It might affect their plans of relocation or the type of job they have.

    How to Tackle Your Partner’s Parenthood Choice

    • Relationship compatibility is essential when you want to settle down. Always communicate your plans the minute you see a lifetime with another person, as stated by Marriage.com.
    • Realize that your partner not wanting kids can be shocking and leave you feeling betrayed. But there are ways to deal with it without staying devastated.
    • There is no need to end the marriage abruptly without exhausting all options. If your partner needs counseling, help guide them through the process with a professional. But always be willing to try.
    • Avoid the blame game and commit to resolving the issue.
    • Always be willing to compromise. If your husband or wife is unwilling to have kids due to their career trajectory, give them a chance. A few years won’t hurt!

    Whatever the reasons are, have listening ears and show compassion. Your partner’s choices regarding parenthood are valid to both of you.

    Importantly, try not to go against solid personal convictions you may regret later.

  • What Happens When You Read Your Partner’s Messages?

    What Happens When You Read Your Partner’s Messages?

    The big question about reading your partner’s messages is if it is right or wrong. The truth is all romantic relationships have their downtime. This sober period doesn’t mean that you or your partner is a bad person. The only thing you should avoid is abuse, be it physical or emotional.

    With the evolving nature of the world and advanced technology, it’s easy to get a hold of your partner’s device. A phone or laptop tells much about a person’s lifestyle or career preference. Snooping through it without the knowledge or approval of your other half can be dangerous. You may discover details that can save you from a faulty love story. Although it may be for your good, invading your partner’s privacy can leave you heartbroken.

    Why You May Need To Read Your Partner’s Messages

    Once there are signs of emotional manipulation, you may feel the need to look around. Getting on your partner’s device may be a way to validate yourself. But try not to do it. If there are signs of gaslighting, and you are convinced, there is no need to hide. Bravely navigate the situation by communicating.

    If he or she has cheated on you in the past, you will surely be scared. But you can not keep a partner who does not want to be kept. Reading your partner’s messages when they are absent will do no good. It will only serve as more fuel to the fire.

    The need to feel attached to someone can be a reason to snoop. If you suffer abandonment issues, it may be difficult to convince yourself that your action is a breach of trust.

    Once you suffer communication problems, your go-to will be to read your partner’s phone messages. This can be dangerous and helpful but stay away from their devices altogether. If your partner has exhibited strange behaviors, they may be stressed or tired of the romance. And checking their phones can tell you that. But the flip side is that you may lose that person due to a breach of trust — especially when they are innocent.

    Ways Of Dealing With Trust Issues Other Than Snooping

    100% of the time, it is best to talk out your fears and frustrations. Glam explains that you should walk through the consequences of reading your partner’s messages. Ask yourself if it will help the relationship.
    Additionally, learn not to be overly suspicious. If a former lover has betrayed you, try to give the new one a chance.

    When you are sure something needs to be addressed, compose your words without emotions. Tell your lover how you feel in clear terms. Together, you two can work things out, as your lover will certainly put your mind at ease. In other words, it’s better to talk things out with your partner than snooping around. If you need access to your partner’s phone, and they disagree or hesitate, it may be a sign that something is wrong.

    Clique, what are your thoughts?

  • How to Recognize and Combat Gaslighting Tactics

    How to Recognize and Combat Gaslighting Tactics

    Gaslighting is equal to emotional manipulation, and dealing with it is something not many people know how to do. In relationships, the perpetrators (gaslighters) hope to suppress and override their partners. This behavior can cause exhaustion of the mind and sometimes challenge one’s sanity. Apart from questioning the validity of the victim’s thoughts, they will also feel overpowered and voiceless. See other gaslighting-stemmed challenges below.

    Challenges Faced When Dealing with Gaslighting or Emotional Manipulation

    Never consider putting up once you notice gaslighting, as the best way to deal with it is to exit the relationship completely. This is because the consequences of remaining in such a space may lead to irreparable damage. Here are some signs that emotional manipulation is about to set in:

    Depression

    This is one effect on the table, and it manifests in different forms. Sadly, at the end of the day, it leaves you feeling less confident, gloomy, and even suicidal in some cases.

    Inability to Think for Yourself

    It becomes hard to arrive at a conclusion, and when you do, you doubt your opinions.

    Some People Can Experience PTSD

    Per Psych Central, studies showed that nurses who suffered gaslighting showed symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

    It is important to note that gaslighting is not restricted to lovers. It can be prevalent in mother-and-child relationships or any kind of partnership where you depend on each other.

    Combat Gaslighting Today

    The moment you are able to clarify that you are in an emotional manipulation base, opt-out. Here’s how to do so.

    Be Aware

    In treating any behavior as the victim, you must recognize what you are fighting. As soon as you are clouded with doubts and experience low self-esteem, it’s a red flag.

    Deal With Gaslighting By Encouraging Yourself

    If this means affirming your worth daily while staring into the mirror, don’t hesitate. Once you can cheer yourself up, it reduces the effects of gaslighting.

    Try Creating Healthy Boundaries

    Boundaries are important in any type of relationship. This tells the other person what and what not to do. So, it is easy to get off the claws of emotional manipulation this way.

    Stay Away from Unproductive Arguments

    The moment you see an argument only leaves you in a fix, avoid it. If it is impossible to clarify things without debates, then set an expiration date for such a relationship.

    You have the ability to change the template of your relationship if it involves gaslighting. Never trade your mental health to please a person. And be quick to log off once that relationship drains your energy!

  • Unleashing the Strength of Inquiry: The Power of Asking Questions

    Unleashing the Strength of Inquiry: The Power of Asking Questions

    Asking questions can get you in trouble, but it is also best to stay curious by employing effective questioning skills. The ability to inquire leads to exploration and answers, which can add to your knowledge. But there is a way to do it. Ever wondered how a 4-year-old can ask, “Why is the sky blue?” And get a cool stare for being cute and genius-minded? Well, here is your answer!

    The ability to sway with your questions lies in how you cushion them. Nobody wants to be bothered, but employing questioning skills will make you appear better to the person in the hot seat.

    Benefits of Proper Questioning Skills

    We have established that questioning people appropriately is not bad. But your ability to convey your inquiry as an intelligent person can earn you some respect, plus the required answers. But there are other benefits:

    • Asking a question means that you are hungry for knowledge. If you listen attentively, you can gain the knowledge you desperately seek.
    • It will boost your self-confidence, and you will gather experiences from all walks of life.
    • You will be a problem solver once you can apply your knowledge.

    How To Develop Effective Questioning Skills

    Be ready to listen whenever you seek an answer. Don’t be in a hurry to answer yourself. Be attentive and show the other person that you empathize with them. ConnectionCultueGroup‘s website maintains that it is rude to interrupt someone trying to answer your question.

    People will praise you for asking questions. Even though you do not match up to them in terms of achievements or status, many will appreciate your humility. People want to share their experiences, and it takes the right person to get answers from them.

    Relationships and connections are born by poking the right holes with words. You can begin a conversation that leads to a lifetime friendship, partnership, or romance.

    You can own the conversation by asking your questions. If you also want to limit the answers you are dishing out, putting the conversation in their court will do the trick. Don’t worry about inquiring, but choose to ask the right ones. As highlighted above, there are various benefits to wanting answers, and you cannot go wrong!

    It is believed that people who ask questions never miss their way. Relevant questions help you remain on the right track.

  • Honesty Has A Bargaining Power In Every Relationship

    Honesty Has A Bargaining Power In Every Relationship

    Your relationship can be hassle-free if honesty isn’t a problem. But did you know that honesty is not merely the absence of lies in your relationship? Although lovers owe it to each other to tell the truth, they are also compelled to be open. That is when true honesty occurs. When you feel comfortable sharing your insecurities with your spouse or better half, you are in for a smooth sailing.

    Here Are Personal Questions To CheckMate Your Honesty

    It has been agreed that intimacy does not promote honesty; if anything, many lie to retain intimacy in a romance. But since you aim to be yourself while being with the one who makes you happy, practicing honesty is vital.

    To evaluate honesty in your relationship, ask questions like:

    • Can I freely have specific conversations with my partner?
    • When I am truthful, does my partner receive it, and how does it make me feel?
    • Would I trade complete honesty when it matters most in my romance?

    After finding the perfect answers to your puzzle, you can choose which side you are on. If you believe honesty in relationships is the right way to go, do these:

    Compose Your Words And Thoughts The Right Way

    Because you are honest with your intimate partner, do not allow hurtful criticism. Measure the weight of your words and be kind enough to understand your partner’s angle even after explaining yourself.

    Resist From Jumping Into Conclusions

    If you are dating a human being, they can be reasoned with. Avoid hasty conclusions and try not to be judgmental. This can help you fashion your honesty. You will remain open to dissecting matters and speaking freely about them.

    Look Out For Authenticity

    Be convinced that you are not faking your emotions or suppressing them. To show complete honesty in intimacy, your partner should know and value your worth. When you are assured that they can handle your vulnerable sides, it makes it seamless, to be honest.

    Do not think it will be easy to be honest as it involves being open about YOU.

    According to Psychalive:

    “It may not always lead to the easiest conversations, but this kind of openness creates a richer level of intimacy and a much more solid foundation for a relationship.”

    If anyone walks out of your life because of your truthfulness, it’s on them. However, never try to use your honesty in a relationship as a reason to be cold and mannerless. Show empathy in your words and actions.